Soul Searching

Summary: Kind of lyrics, feelings of insecurity, confusion, self doubt. You have to embrace them or they will destroy your spirit.
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A series of perceptions.
I wonder round like clay.
Is there anything between us?
Or do we fall back and stay?

The sun rises up.
Feel so out of place.
Try to stick like mud.
To anyone I can't chase.

Unsure of the certain.
Heart emptied again.
For here's the confusion.
That leaves me in pain.

Perceptions and Truths

Summary: The world is all about perceptions and truths. We create perceptions to hide or distort truths that we can't or don't want to accept. Sometimes other people create perceptions for us and we start to believe them. Truths almost always hit home eventually so believing perceptions can hurt you a lot.

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I'm being loaded, with angels and spies.
Walking around, with demons in eyes.

I'm held hostage, by perceptions portrayed.
Truths come out, by perceptions betrayed.

Can't see the truth, for fears held inside.
Blinded in sight, for upkeep in pride.

Put me to rest, with words I long for.
Never to be seen, with feelings I adore.

Inbetween Lives

Summary: Does after-life exsist? If so what is it like and do our souls go on? Disabled people are said to have evolved souls. Is this an inbetween life I'm living this time round? As sometimes it feels like I'm not here and don't take part.
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Pure light, a time to reflect.
Pure sight, a time to detect.
Is this living?
Or just being?
I hope the lord is real.

At the end of this light, I begin.
Stuck in this plight, no chance to sin.
Can I evolve?
Begin again?
I hope my soul will be ful-filled.

Enhanced thinking, looking in on the world.
Exsessive drinking, to pass this time as sold.
Will I have learned?
Or be spoilt?
I hope I can carry out the actions I've planned.

Waiting to be delivered, into the dark.
Wanting to be discovered, alone in a park.
What is living?
As good as my dreams?
I hope I can take part next time.

Brave

Summary: Are disabled people brave or lazy? Trying to do anything independent or normal results in the cliche 'arent they brave' comments. Doing nothing and being dependant gets the 'lazy' label. My advice is be 'brave' but ingore the plaudits until they are justified and genuine.

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Venture out of the cave.
To be told I'm brave.
It's not the way I behave.

Endeavour to do mundane tasks.
Feel that I have to ask.
There's a person under this mask.

Travelling over nervous ground.
Loud eyes don't make a sound.
Whatever I do is profound.

Aardvark

Summary: Humourous take on life and diversity. Could loving a disabled person be like loving an aardvark? IE - Something completely different.

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In love with an aardvark.

The way he looks makes my heart spark.

Lets not waste time with small talk.

We can create a new species and build an ark.

Normally Different

Summary: Inspired by a number of dinner functions I've been to, you try to blend in and be normal but its not you and situations make you realise you aren't the same as everyone else. There's also falseness all around.

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Seeking to be normal,
a common cancer.
Perception,
is not who you are.
Only you know that.

Dimmed lights welcome me,
into traditional feasting.
Anticipation,
of a jolly evening.
I am more comfortable this time.

Factory-line important males,
lounge in supremacy.
Hesitantly,
they engage me.
Ruby alcohol fuelled chat.

Dazzling fillies strut,
jewels amongst cogs.
Decorate,
a plain backdrop.
Softens the mood.

Royalty sits above,
the peasant majority.
Encouragement,
dished out to the deserving.
Warm fulfil ness.

Right or Wrong

Summary: After some deep thinking and getting sick of the news and debates over massive issues, I wrote this. In the firm belief that there is no right and wrong in the world and too much judgementalism and predudism. Too many people who think they're right and can't let things be.

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Who's to say what's right or wrong?
What's right is wrong to another.
It's not ours to discover.

Look up to the stars,
there's no right or wrong in them.

Why keep playing the same song?
Too intelligent for our own good.
Decisions not to be understood.

Look down to the earth,
there's no right or wrong in it.

Do some debates go on too long?
Religion teaches the right values in life.
Values that ultimately lead to strife.

Look out to the sea,
there's no right or wrong.

Does the truth know where to belong?
History tells us of evil sights.
Evil in the shape of white knights.....

Confused

Summary: Just a small poem about the confusion of life and inner struggles I find myself going through. It also tells of the difficulty of trying to be yourself with the restrictions of disability and peoples perceptions of you.
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Walk in a room, it smells of paint.
I know this place, I'm comfortable here.
Where it should be, its so familier.
The people know me, they're my friends.
That's where it ends, I'm alone inside.
Treat like a child, in an adult's body.
No help for myself, decisions made for me.
Confidence I had is gone, and I know why.
I'm not shy, that's just how you want me to be.

Understanding/Perception

Summary: As you can tell perception interests me. This just portrayes the feelings I have when not allowed to express myself the way I want in social settings. Usually people that don't know me well or have short minds, it can be intimidating and demeaning.
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They don't understand
talking amonst themselves
Pidgeons flocking
uncomprendable noise

Feeling awkward
they don't understand
Vultures circling
deathly silence

They feel sorry
compasionate eyes
Demons gather
questioning thoughts

Breathing You

Summary: This is more traditional love poetry. When you fall for someone all you want is certain things from them, sometimes they oblidge and a relationship can start, but sometimes they don't and that's when your heart gets broken.
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Breathe me in, when all I breathe is you.
Seek my gaze, when all I see is you.
Talk to me, when all I hear is you.
Hold me close, when all I feel is you.
Feed my hunger, when all I taste is you.
Be with me, when all I want is you.